back home again

so sorry i havent writen for a while. i feel prety stressed out being back home. kinda hard to get used to everything and all the crazyness that happens here at home. i dont know if i am really that excited to be here. i mean its cool and all to see my family but i kinda just want my own place. in the mornings i wake up to mya yelling and being really loud, i roll over and attemp to at least sleep in until 8. i have been able to keep rolling over and eventually sleep in until around 10. then i get up and something is always crazy. i think having my own place would be great! silence... i like it. oh well, i guess that isnt for this summer.

besides being home i started up working at farmstead again. i like it and all but it just isnt the same as when i began. first of all cheryl drives me crazy, i really want to put in a complaint about her. Nice lady, bad manager. also its a lot harder now that the people i looked forward to seeing are either passed away or went to a different home. to be honest i am really glad that i have changed my major. being a nurse would just not have suited me well. i love the people i work for and serve, but i would rather serve them in a diff way than food. like i really enjoyed volunteering. maybe, if i ever have kids (which seems like a small chance since mya, i love the girl, but she is driving me crazy when she is in a bad mood) i will take them and play games at an assisted living place or nursing home. i think that would be a good thing to do.

now i am looking for another job to add to my list. i need to get making money here. farmstead pays well but only working 3 hours at a time and only 5 days per pay period, it just doesnt work for a college student. so here i go looking....

oh the other day jon and i headed up to superior to visit the college one last time before the fall. we were both going to get an appointment with our advisors but mine wasnt around. he had one with his though. she was cool. she had those brain teaser things on her desk (like rubixcube) and i got one all the way done. i was so proud of myself. jon and i didnt do much else up there because it started to rain. on the way back home we had a marker war, probably not the best since he was driving and all. i feel like every time we get together i just feel worn out or really loopy, which isnt cool. sometimes i wonder why he puts up with me.

so life is good but i dont like being back in the summer routine. kinda miss college dorm life. ok so really i just miss hangin out with the friends and not having all this hussle bussle around me have me in it too. at least at the dorm i could ignore it cause it had nothing to do with me.

hiking with a camera

these are some pics that i took in the last month or so. some from montana, south dakota, the wyoming ones i get to pick up tomorrow!

another day in the soda

joe and rachael at the top of crow peak.

leaving it behind

so everyone is now surely packing up, finished with finals and heading out the door with all their belongings. a few tears have been shed. like when erin and her group hugged skye, saying goodbye. she isnt coming back.

funny how now that everyone is leaving people are lending others a hand. its nice to see people holding the doors and all the parents coming and significant others helping their loved ones.

i'm afraid. what have i gotten myself into by leaving. i feel like i have just been on vacation this whole time. like when my family and i come to visit custer state park. kinda like that, except i stayed longer and actually made friends (although we did make friends in the pool a few years in a row).

may the sun shine, and the bright light capture my heart. the growing smiles and hearts grow larger with every stride. (ok, done with that)

lost in the world of transformation

at 9:45 today i took my last final for my freshmen year of college. i cant believe that i am already done! after our last lunch party with the three of us shelli and i went, sold her books, and then walked down mainstreet checking out all the shops. it was a lot of fun. i love hanging out with her! last night we were supposed to be studying, yeah. we ended up having some good converstion. she told me her mom went out to the west coast for her first year of college and that she is still really close to a friend there. she said when they get together its as if they had never been seperated by the distance. that was encouraging.

i have no idea what i am ganna do all day tomorrow. its ganna be crazy. i am so excited to go visit jenny and shelli's homes and see their family. it is going to be good to see what life is for them bakc home. :)

i was telling shelli yestday how long the trip will be back home from lovell to my house. about 14 hours, then i was like... whoa!! that is longer than the eternity flight!!! that is crazy. it will give me a lot of time to think things over though. it will be a good time. its nice not to have the weight of classes on my shoulders now, weird though cause i feel like i should be doing something.

Sunday showers

Small sparks shower above
Showing signs of sadness
Sorting souls heavy sorrows
Swallowing her secret blemishes
Subtly seeing lives substance
She seizes her sincere story
Sweetly singing softhearted songs
Softly she sways from side to side
Shadows once showing dwindle
Soaring swiftly across the sky

She stains the stars with her soul

a quote from carrie

"A single moment in life could spark a friendship that could last a lifetime."

studying... the coolest thing around! 

fire alarm

so at about 4:50am the fire alarm goes off. i wake up with the lights flashing, the alarm beeping. i looked up, my roomie not getting up. i was like, "erin, erin, ERIN!" then we held our blankets around us and walked out. as erin and i passed the kitchen/lobby there was smoke hugging the ceiling. The smelled and smoke was billowing through the door. ok, so it wasnt horid but yeah.

we went outside for about an hour, sat in pangburn and waited for the fire dept. to take care of it. oh also, erin, the hall director had a trash can in front of her door leaning against it with water in it. i heard that the smoke thing was a prank. what i heard through the grape vine was that someone had put an already popped bag of popcorn in the microwave (which is right on the other side of the wall from erin and i's beds, and my head). so they are saying it was a prank. that is not cool. i decided that i should start a list of all the crazy things that have happened this year. oh and to add to that, it is may 9th and its snowing. yeah so that is how my life is going. now it is time to start studying for the next final i have tomorrow. life is interesting. when i am old and gray and kids ask me about my college years i will have so many things to say. anyways.... studying... i guess i should do that.

crow peak

yesterday i went to church and then had my last brunch with my brunch-buddies. it was fun. then i went with joe, rachael, and andy and we climbed crow peak. it was fun. i took a lot of pics and then found out it was a b&w roll... that will be interesting. i really wanted the color. oh well. i also lost my lense cap. that really sucked. but all together with the rain and cigarettes it was a lot of fun. i am glad that joe decided to stop here and hang with me on his trip out to denver. at first i was kinda reluctant but now i am really happy he did. the only problem is i need to get my studying done now instead of last weekend. other than that it was a blast. i slept so well last night! i stayed with shana at her apartment. it was fun. now i am just waiting to eat lunch and then head off to my english final.

i dont know what to think about it being the last week of school. its been good...

almost finals week

i feel like i havent written for a while which is prety true. the last few weeks have been crazy. I'm loving every bit of it. I am honestly going to miss my friends at BH.

i havent been doing much besides hangin out. the last half of the week i didnt have much to. shana got her appartment so i have been helping her. also her and i had a jones soda date and are going to keep the bottles that have a note from eachother in them.

i went with shelli, her grandma and mom, and jenny to sanfords yesterday (friday). it was good. jenny was so blunt it was funny but sometimes kinda too much. that is the first time i have ever thought that about her, and now i feel bad. but all in all it was fun. then we went to the ministery house, looked at the pupies and played a bunch of games. a few of us climbed up on the roof, mike brought his guitar up with him. it was kinda funny to see him struggling up. good thing nothing happened to his guitar. i got some fantastic clips of funny things on the video camera. later on in life i am ganna get some good laughs out of it. for now watching it would make me cry, i think that when i watch it at home it will cause me to tear up a bit, laugh a lot too.... !!!

now i am just waiting for joe to get here. he is ganna stop here on his way to denver. he has a court case because of the car accident that he had gotten into over easter. so i dont really know what i am going to do with him. maybe hike up crow peak tomorrow. i really want to go to the last sunday brunch though and the Arri's are having a party thing at there house tomorrow night. tonight my friends are hangin out at the city park and just ganna fool around. maybe i will see if joe wants to go. im a little weary about that though, i think if potter has his long board he would like it. but i dont know... why couldnt he have come a few weekends ago. sometimes things are just bad timeing. love the kid to death but, when i want to hang out he barely ever can and when i dont really care he's here. oh well, it will be nice to hang out with him. it will all work out, i wish he would just get here though. alright enough of that. i need to go do something. i would go skate around but i dont have the board and i dont have my bike either. i will find something before i go crazy...

coming to an end

so i went to billings this weekend. that was good. did some hiking up near Red Lodge, MT. It was good to see Jon.

back here in spearfish i am slowly packing, i kinda want to leave right now but i also dont want to leave at all. when leaving im ganna be leaving shana, shelli, and jenny... and that is no good. i love them oh so dearly. I hope the friendships will last the distance. :) as the time for leaving gets closer i am getting a little more anxious about it. changing schools, i am in my comfort zone, i know people here, i love the scenery, but i know its for the best intent of jon and my relationship that we go to the same school. also it will be better cause they are more equipt for my major. but all in all, it is kinda scary, nerve racking. it will be good though. im ready for this. and summer will be good! (i hope...) alright, time for dinner soon here... later.